Birthday View ( Richard Gaston )
the last 2 years have been completely exhausting/soul sucking. i’ve grown completely detached. No one talks to me anymore, online or irl, and I don’t blame them, I probably pushed away or neglected most out of fear of causing any collateral damage while in a depressed state. Already burnt myself out working in the entertainment industry in a toxic work environment ripe with a culture of accepted alcohol, substance, and sexual abuse, decided to take a breather and move to the middle of nowhere. First few months went well… only to lose 3 close people within a month of each other (health complications/murder/suicide). At the time I didn’t really have my usual support network having just moved to a new town and turned into a bit of a recluse. Totaled my car in an accident I don’t remember. A family health scare prompted me to move closer to them. Thankful they’ve healed. Now I’m in another “foreign place”, no friends, shitty job with an unsupported creative network in the area if you’re not a local or trying to be King of the Hill. Most nights I’m just sitting here just like this. At least I have a back catalog of art/animation/music ideas that keep me pressing forward. But I’m utterly exhausted. I just want to take a nap on a friends couch and recharge the batteries.
